"You Don't Need A Wedding Planner / Coordinator, Because I'll Do It"
I truly don’t understand the ‘want’ in the wedding industry for everyone to toss in the role of ‘wedding planner’ or ‘wedding coordinator’ to their list of services … let me tell you a story …
I was a very ‘type A bride’ when I got married in 2007 … it wasn’t until the very last minute that I ended up hiring a month of wedding planner (back then they were still called day-of planners) and had I not, my day would have been quite a disaster as there were so many things that happened on the day that could have ONLY BEEN HANDLED by a planner. For instance, at the ceremony, the company who said they’d line up all the chairs into rows just ended up leaving them on the side of the road … guests were arriving and my planner was running around (IN THE RAIN!!! … which also wasn’t planned) to set up all 80 chairs for the ceremony … I could go on and on to explain all the things that saved my day because I had an actual planner … not a VENUE PLANNER … but a real planner who was there FOR ME … to catch all the little things that other people wouldn’t have caught.
OUR WEDDING PLANNER SAVED OUR WEDDING DAY
I get so tired of seeing wedding websites say that they’ll BE the wedding planner … with their f*cking lists and supposed ‘vendor matchmaking skills’ that are based on something you TYPE into their website … srsly??? I don’t know about you, but with something as emotional and as important as a wedding day, I don't want my vendors to be automated for me … I want to chat with them, discuss my dreams, and hear their voice …
Now, onto my point of this post …
VENDORS WHO TELL THEIR BRIDES THAT THEY DON’T NEED A PLANNER BECAUSE THEY OFFER THAT SERVICE
Uhhhhhh …. what!!?? So, lemme get this straight … while you are (for example) DJ’ing the event and handling the music and coordinating the first dances … you are also going to run around and put out fires that may be happening elsewhere on the day?? Oh, you’re not going to do that?? Ahhh … so you really DON’T OFFER PLANNING … Here’s the thing:
THIS IS A VERY CONFUSING MESSAGE THAT IS ROYALLY F*CKING UP THE DEFINITION OF WHAT A WEDDING PLANNER DOES
Education is key in our industry. If we all educate correctly, it can help keep brides from feeling stressed out and angry when they are ‘in it’ and experiencing the waves of planning their wedding - therefore protecting the ‘life’ of being a small business owner in the wedding industry. If ‘vendors’ with other focuses are telling their brides in a ‘trying to be helpful way’ that they really don’t need a planner because they (let’s pretend they are a florist) will handle that for them - but they don’t really handle all the different hats a planner wears - then what was the point of saying that in the first place? In other words:
WHAT ARE YOU GAINING BY CUTTING OUT THE WEDDING PLANNER FROM THE EQUATION???
Do you think that by ‘making friends’ with the client to ‘save them money’ from the cost of hiring a planner that they will love you oodles and oodles and feel like you just made their life even better by cutting that cost out of their budget?? Or that maybe by cutting that cost they will spend more with you??
IT’S JUST NOT COOL.
No, Heather, it’s just that I’ve worked with so many sh*tty planners that have actually DESTROYED the wedding day and made my job even harder … so I’ve stopped suggesting that my clients hire planners.
THERE WILL ALWAYS BE PEOPLE WHO ARE SH*TTY AT THEIR JOB.
Sh*tty people suck. Period. It’s true that one person can ruin it for the bunch … and if you are working a wedding with a planner who f*cks things up left and right, it can ruin you from wanting to refer planners in the future … but this is why the wedding industry relies on networking and getting to know who you can trust and who you can’t. Who you love working with and who you can’t get away from fast enough. The message isn’t:
STOP HIRING PLANNERS.
The message is:
HIRE THE RIGHT PLANNERS.
It’s vital that you, the vendor who isn’t a planner, gets to know who rocks it and who doesn’t … because if the message was reversed and all the planners started telling their brides that they don’t need to hire a florist - they’ll bring flowers - you’d be pretty sour over that.
HEATHER, WHAT SET YOU OFF TODAY AND MADE YOU WRITE THIS POST?
I’m glad you asked! This last week I have seen numerous FB posts from planners saying that other vendors are trying to cut them out of the process … I also get so tired of wedding blogs (NOT all of them!!!) tellings brides they don’t need a planner and just to use their ‘wedding planning’ software … or something similar to that effect.
WE ARE ENTERING HIRING SEASON … LET’S ALL GET ON THE SAME PAGE.
Hiring season is right around the corner … so I feel this message comes at a good time … having a team mentality … checking in with your favorite vendors … the ones that make the wedding day a happy time … this is the time to do that … and if you do get a bride who hired a planner that you know sucks big time??? Then get your sh*t together even more … prepare for that … and then it won’t feel as awful ;)