Style Me Pretty is Saved ... Let's Discuss Some of the FB Comments
Are you rejoicing in the recent SMP news?? Do you have whiplash? Are you pissed? Are you confused? Are you 'meh' about it? Yesterday it was announced that Abby and Tait have 'acquired again' the Style Me Pretty assets and that they will be taking over the beloved wedding blog. I'll be honest, here was my FIRST REAL reaction:
WHY THE F*CK WOULD YOU DO THAT??
If I had worked my ass off on a wedding blog I created for YEARS and someone approached me to buy it for MILLIONS OF DOLLARS ... and I decided to sell it ... I would be off with my family enjoying early retirement ... I would start a passion project or two ... I would get involved with my kid's school and volunteer my time each week ... and I would kiss that 'blog owner life' good-bye ... because that is the DREAM! Create something and have someone interested in it enough to want to purchase it for a large price.
AM I RIGHT???
Look, I fully understand the emotional connection that business owners or blog editors make to their 'baby' .... their blog, their content, the community it builds and creates ... it's truly an amazing thing to watch and help grow ... BUT: if you were given millions of dollars and you don't have to work ... I'll be honest ... I actually became a tiny bit angry too ... just for a second ...
personal story alert:
my kids, who are 5 and 7, have started saying to me: mom, you love your phone more than you love us ... it's the WORST thing to hear ... it breaks my heart into a million pieces ... if I was given the gift of working less and being with my kids more, I would. Do I love what I do?? YESSSSSSSS!!!! I do! But if I could do it less, I 100% would - if I could put my phone down and my work away whenever the kids are home (which isn't realistic and will never happen) - I would. I love being creative and I love designing websites ... I love my business relationships ... but my kids are getting to an age where they notice my focus being somewhere else ... and it's starting to affect them :(
OK, BACK TO MY POINT OF THIS POST ...
So, Style Me Pretty ... it's continuing ... and I have to say, even though I hate getting sucked into FB comments, I gave a full read of the comments on the SMP 'being saved' announcement ... it was filled with a lot of bitter, angry, irritated, and off-base comments ... here's the thing:
IF YOU ARE A HUGE SUCCESS THEN YOU HAVE DONE A VERY GOOD JOB OF TARGETING TO A SPECIFIC AUDIENCE
Target markets are the key to success. You can't have a success story in business and be a flopping fish all over the place ... you have to CHOOSE who you are targeting and you have to stick to it. A lot of the commenters made blanket statements like:
- you NEVER showcase multicultural weddings
- you NEVER showcase same sex marriages
- you NEVER showcase people of color
- you NEVER showcase non-film photography
- you NEVER showcase moodier or dark styles
- you ONLY share weddings in a field
- you ONLY want to share mason jar weddings
- you ONLY share blonde white brides
- and on and on and on and on and on and on ...
First of all, I hate blanket statements ... nobody is ALWAYS something ... didja like my grammar << there? You can't say to someone: YOU ALWAYS DO THIS or YOU NEVER DO THIS ... universal statements create bitterness and they are never true ... hahahaha ... I just made a blanket statement about universal statements ... lol ...
Look, Style Me Pretty does have standards ... mostly their standards have to do with photography style and details ...
SO, YOU WERE NEVER FEATURED ON STYLE ME PRETTY AND YOU'RE PRETTY BITTER ABOUT IT ...
So your answer is to be angry? No. Just 'up' your standards and be a little more understanding about how large of a job it is to be a blog editor ... the endless number of submissions a publication like SMP probably gets is crazy!!! They have to have criteria they go by ... they have a target market ... they have a 'look' that's all about THEIR DEFINITION OF PRETTY ... are they for everyone?? Nope!!
And they f*cking shouldn't be either.
If SMP threw their standards out the window and just accepted whatever came their way it wouldn't be special. Heather, are you actually saying that if SMP showcased more same sex weddings or people of color it wouldn't be special??? HELL F*CKING NO!!!!!!!!!!
I am 100% not saying that.
I am saying that there is so much that goes into a submission ... so much that a blog editor who has a certain 'message' they are creating on their platform has to take into consideration when they accept a wedding for a feature. Some of those include:
- The photos - photography style
- The details - trends, colors
- The story - the couple, who they are
- The team of professionals - who made the wedding happen
Being a blog editor isn't just: Oh, here's a wedding ... looks cool ... let's feature it ... or at least it shouldn't be like that ... there is so much to consider and the other part??? You have to be FAST AT MAKING DECISIONS ... you need to know immediately: does this fit the message of my blog?? YES or NO ... I doubt very much that every same sex wedding that SMP received, regardless of the details or the photography, they were just like: OHP, NOPE!!! And I know that's not true, because I found SO MANY posts relating to same sex marriages on SMP this morning when I was searching.
AND THAT'S JUST ONE EXAMPLE
Look, my point to this post aside from just venting?? If you love Style Me Pretty you love it because their voice is your voice ... or at least their voice is one you are striving to be more like .... if you don't love it, it's not because of the list of things noted in the comments, because those things aren't true ... it's because SMP just isn't your jam!! And that's ok!! There are sooooooooo many blogs out there ... each one devoted to a certain vibe ... not all blogs are the same and they definitely shouldn't be.
DO I THINK STYLE ME PRETTY NEEDS TO CHANGE?
Honestly, no. The standards for photography style and details are just as they should be IMO ... what should happen?? If you are a photographer who was never featured on SMP and you are sticking to your belief that it's because you had a bride and groom of color in the wedding you submitted ... welp, may I just make a suggestion: maybe it's your photography style ... maybe you need to work on your craft ... if you are a wedding designer who has been rejected over and over and over again and you want to be angry and believe it's because the couples were same sex couples ... maybe it was the photographer you chose to work with or the details just weren't that great. Another option? Maybe SMP had just accepted 3 weddings that had the same vibe as the one you submitted and it was too close of a look and they wanted to have some variety ... Instead of making this about race, religion, or sexual orientation I suggest putting those thoughts away because they just create more anger in a world that is already pretty angry ... turn your love on a blog that is all about that message instead and focus on building it up and making is awesome with your amazing content. Start advertising on multi-cultural blogs and supporting their awesomeness so they can stick around and grow to be even bigger! Don't get mad at a blog who isn't doing it as much ... that's just silly :)
One of the major things everyone needs to learn from the news of SMP maybe closing a week or so ago: DO NOT PUT ALL YOUR EGGS IN ONE BASKET!!!!! Spread the love around ... that way the next time your favorite blog 'may go down in flames' you won't be so freaked out over it ;)